Bad news: Evan Foster has transmigrated back to ancient times, but he himself is useless at manual labor and knows nothing about farming, and his major—cybersecurity—is of no use to ancient people.

Good news: He’s bound to a system.

Bad news: The system is called the Gossip System. Not the fortune-telling kind of gossip, but the kind that contains other people’s private information and juicy secrets. Completely useless.

Second bad news: The system is broken, and the resulting bugs are unknown.

Third bad news: This body belongs to a minor official who managed to get into court meetings, but as a transmigrator… he doesn’t know the Four Books and Five Classics, can’t write with a brush, and is at risk of being reported for cheating in the imperial exams.

Evan Foster: "..."

Forget it, I’ll just lie flat and wait for death. Maybe if I die quickly, I’ll transmigrate back.

...

In the imperial court, the emperor was furious over state affairs, and the ministers trembled in fear.

Evan Foster pretended to listen intently, but was actually focused on browsing the Gossip System.

[Wow, His Majesty just took in a sixteen-year-old concubine yesterday! Like a pear blossom pressing down on a begonia! Still vigorous in old age! And he spent the whole night tossing and turning with her, didn’t sleep at all, and can still sound so powerful and energetic now! Impressive!]

[This concubine was actually once the crown prince’s secret lover, wow wow wow! The crown prince even knows how to do waist-grabbing, red-eyed literature!]

[Wow wow wow wow! The crown prince barged into his grandfather’s harem… hsss—took advantage of the old emperor being at court to get it on! Hurry up, hurry up! Why isn’t there a video…?]

[Eh? Why is there no sound now?]

Evan Foster cautiously looked up, sneaking a glance around.

[What happened? Why is everyone kneeling? Where’s the emperor?]

—The emperor went to the harem to catch them in the act.

＊

The “imperial exam cheating” bomb finally exploded.

Evan Foster couldn’t explain why his handwriting didn’t match the one on the exam paper, nor could he answer why he didn’t know the Four Books and Five Classics.

The crown prince, who had just lost his secret lover, presented damning evidence, and his personal guard pounced, ready to drag Evan Foster off to prison to await execution after autumn.

Evan Foster clutched the gossip that could prove his innocence, but was deeply troubled:

How am I supposed to explain my source of information…

[Saying I secretly met the chief examiner, the Minister of Rites, three nights before the exam? Impossible, that night the Minister of Rites was cross-dressing and spent the night at the General’s mansion, with the Grand General…]

The Grand General’s body trembled, and he interrupted on the spot: “Your Majesty!!!!”

“Although the evidence of cheating is solid, I believe there’s something fishy about this case and it should be re-investigated! Especially since Xu… Xu… Evan Foster is always so well-dressed! How could someone who cares so much about his appearance sully his own reputation!”

The crown prince, who couldn’t hear inner voices: ?

[Also, saying the examiner pretended to yawn and act sleepy to give me a chance to copy—he spent the night before the exam in a pigsty without sleeping, how could he not be tired the next day? But to think a dignified Hanlin Academician would actually believe in pig’s milk…]

The Hanlin Academician’s face turned pale, and he rushed forward: “Your Majesty!!!”

“I… I agree with the Grand General! How could Mr. Foster cheat in the imperial exams! He… he… he even drank a cup of pure water before the exam, believing only good people can use pure things. How could such a kind person cheat?”

The crown prince, who thought he had it in the bag: ??

Evan Foster was deeply moved.

[They’re all good people—even if they’re not too bright, they’re still trying their best to find reasons and excuses for me.]

[But I really can’t turn this around. Sigh, too bad I didn’t finish the drama I was following. The old emperor made the empress angry last night and got kicked out of the bedchamber. I didn’t get to see the ending before I die. Today he’s planning to put ink on his face and pretend to be a cat to cheer her up…]

“Bang—”

The old emperor slammed the table, forcibly cutting off the endless inner voice: “I believe Evan Foster did not cheat in the imperial exams! Acquitted!”

All the civil and military officials rushed to agree, afraid that if they were a step too slow, Evan Foster would spill more gossip.

“Yes, yes, acquitted!”

“Your Majesty is wise!”

“Your Majesty, please end court quickly! Let Mr. Foster go home and rest! He’s exhausted from standing so long!”

The crown prince: ???

Evan Foster, did you brainwash them or something?

Chapter 1: Shocking! The Crown Prince Breaks into His Grandfather’s Harem!

[Getting up at 3 a.m. to attend court, what a trash emperor.]

Evan Foster stuffed a steamed bun into his robe, braved the wind into the court room, sat in a corner, and started gnawing on the bun.

He also used the system’s gossip as a side dish.

[The Censorate’s assistant official has been fishing for fifteen days and hasn’t caught a single fish, hahahahaha, his fishing skills are terrible!]

[The Minister of War hasn’t bathed, showered, or changed his socks for seven days. Last night his wife finally kicked him out of the bedroom. Amazing, she actually put up with it for seven days. I couldn’t have.]

[Tsk tsk tsk, the Minister of Ceremonies…]

“Ahem.”

Evan Foster looked up and stood respectfully: “May I ask what Edward Clark wishes to instruct me?”

The Minister of Ceremonies, Peter Clark, stroked his beard and smiled: “Mr. Foster, which shop did you buy that steamed bun from? It smells delicious.”

“Oh, oh, it’s…”